The Importance of Jobs

Listen to most politicians and they seem most concerned with creating jobs. The main purpose of the Keystone XL pipeline is to create jobs, regardless of the environmental issues and whether we need the pipeline to transport tar sand oil in the first place. When politicians argue for greater defense spending to build nuclear missiles that cost billions and will never be used, they justify it because it creates jobs. When they want to relax environmental regulations it’s because it costs companies jobs.

Since creating jobs is so vitally important to politicians, why not create jobs by hiring people to watch the politicians? One group of citizens can be hired to make sure politicians don’t sleep with their interns. Another can track politicians to make sure they don’t visit prostitutes. Still another group can follow politicians around all day long to make sure they don’t use illegal drugs or have affairs with other women because that would violate the family values so many politicians love to parade out every election year.

We could also hire people to check into every politician’s statements to see if they lied like Brian Williams did when he claimed he was in a helicopter that got hit when it really did not. More people could be hired to check if politicians are accepting bribes or violating the spirit of democracy by accepting kickbacks and granting favors to friends. Citizens can also be hired to check if politicians are giving jobs to friends and relatives that pay extremely well for doing nothing but soaking the taxpayers.

As you can see, there are plenty of ways politicians can create jobs by simply hiring people to make sure the politicians are actually morally and ethically upstanding like they pretend to be. That alone could create enough jobs for the entire nation and eliminate unemployment forever in this great nation of ours.

So if politicians are serious about creating jobs, this is the answer. The fact that politicians won’t embrace the idea of hiring an army of people to monitor them shows that they’re really not concerned about creating jobs anyway, but if you had just a smidgin of intelligence, you probably already knew that.